Why I started worrying about what I put on my face

Getting stuck in the collagen rabbit hole

It started on a Tuesday afternoon while I was scrolling through some random beauty forum, and suddenly every other post was about hydrolyzed collagen. I had been using the Dermafix collagen cream for a few months because I just needed something to keep my skin from feeling like sandpaper every time I walked into an air-conditioned room. It was fine, it did the job, but then I started reading about how regular collagen molecules are supposedly too big to do anything at all. The whole point of buying the hydrolyzed version is that they’ve broken the particles down so they actually absorb. Honestly, I don’t know if I can tell the difference just by touching my cheeks, but it feels like I’ve been sold a secret that everyone else already knew about.

The endless search for effective ingredients

I ended up looking at a dozen different products online, from those pricey masks to creams that claim to have NMN mixed in with the collagen. It’s exhausting. I remember when I used to just buy whatever was on sale at Olive Young for like 20,000 to 30,000 won. Now I find myself reading the ingredient labels like I’m a chemist or something. There was even a mention of hydrolyzed collagen in a hair mascara I looked at the other day. It’s everywhere now—in oral sprays for gums, in hair products, even in bone supplements for kids. It makes me wonder if I’m just layering the same stuff over and over again, hoping it sticks somewhere.

Why I still buy the masks anyway

I think I’ve spent way too much time staring at the Dermafix mask packs in my cabinet. They aren’t exactly cheap, and waiting for the gel to slowly turn transparent on my face takes at least 30 to 40 minutes, which is usually the time I’d rather be doing literally anything else. Sometimes I’ll put one on and get distracted by an email or a video, and then suddenly an hour has passed and the edges are starting to dry out and pull at my skin. It’s a bit of a commitment, really. Compared to the Japanese collagen supplements I tried once—which just felt like swallowing chalky pills—the cream and the masks feel like I’m actually doing a chore that counts for something, even if the progress is invisible.

The uncertainty of the whole process

Is it actually helping? I’m honestly not sure. I look in the mirror after washing the residue off, and my skin feels plumper, sure, but is it the collagen or just the fact that I’ve kept my face damp for an hour? There are studies out there—I remember seeing one about bone density and collagen peptides—but trying to translate medical papers into my own skincare routine feels like a stretch. I’ve reached a point where I just want a simple answer, but every time I look for one, I just end up finding more complex combinations of peptides and oils. I keep buying the refills, mostly because it’s become a habit now, but I still have this nagging feeling that I’m just paying for expensive moisture.

A routine that feels slightly unfinished

I’m currently halfway through a jar of this NMN collagen cream I picked up on a whim. The texture is decent, not too heavy, and it doesn’t leave that weird sticky film that some of the cheaper store-brand stuff used to leave behind. I think I’ll finish it, but I don’t know if I’ll go out of my way to order it again once it’s gone. It’s not that it doesn’t work, it just feels like the more I focus on these specific ingredients, the less I actually enjoy the process. Maybe I should go back to just using a basic moisturizer and calling it a day, but I’m too far down this road now. I’ll probably just keep testing things until I find something that doesn’t feel like a puzzle I have to solve every morning.